[Dailydrool] Miss Angela's April

[bjenk1 at cox.net]

Bill here, press agent/personal trainer to Miss Angela Basset, Droop and Drool Diva of Wichita and Sedgwick County

My demanding employer is livid that I have not posted this month.  The fact that I have been away for a week, have been working with Val Brewer to get Angela's face immortalized in cloth, and have had a computer glitch for a week does not lessen her ire.  So here goes:

The first week of the month, I went with my friend Chris to a resort on the Maya Riviera in Mexico.  While I was learning a lot about the ancient Maya (and also that I lack sufficient discipline to survive a week at an all inclusive resort), Miss Angela was staying at Chris' house with the two resident dogs.  Chris's son and his wife were dogsitting with Angela, a six-year old doberman and a bi-polar dalmation.  Angie did well, but was relegated to being the low dog on the totem pole which did not make her happy.  She tried to organize amateur theatrics, long sleep-ins and deliberate, grazing meals but her hosts were having none of it.  She was VERY glad to see me when I returned.  

Things settled back into our usual routine (naps, naps and more naps as well as food left out for grazing at all times --both for me and for Angie).  It is usually full-bore spring by this time of the year in Kansas, but this year has been weird.  While I was eating and drinking immoderately at the beach, we had a cold snap (down to 13 one night) that killed lots of early flowers and stopped the blooming of the red bud trees just as they were ready to flower.
My backyard bushes, honeysuckle and wisteria were nipped badly.  By the time I got back, the yard was just beginning to recover.  We got the fishpond cleaned out and the waterfall running, which is big for Angela because running fishwater is her favorite beverage.  She is indifferent to the fish, however.     One night that week, we had a freak snowstorm.  It was a lovely day, in the low 60s/high 50s.  Miss Angela and I had done a nice walk to the local park.  Just after midnight, when I put Angela out to do her business before settling in for the night  (well, I had to wake her up to put her out) and it was snowing.  By three AM, we had an inch or inch and a half on the ground
(according to a friend whose bladder necessitates nocturnal waking) and then it turned quickly warmer.  By 8 AM it was 40 and the snow was all gone.
Angela looked extremely confused when she went out for her first "business" session of the day.  All she found was mud.  Kansas weather never fails to surprise.

Last week, I had a house concert for some performer friends on their way back from an eastern tour.  Miss Angela had a spa day to prepare for the attention she always gets at these gatherings.  While she was gone, I got the house cleaned far beyond my bachelor level of tidiness.  Since the musicians were driving all day, I went out and got a couple of pounds of yummy barbeque
for them to have when they got in.  They pulled in about 6:45 and sat down at the table.  David (Rynhart-a fine guitarist and harmony singer) made a sandwich, ate it and then went out to the yard to set up the sound equipment.
He, like many unacquainted with bassets, never imagined that leaving the carton with the barbecued beef and pork near the edge of the table would be an invitation to counter cruising.  The next time I wandered into the living room,
there was an empty BBQ carton on the floor and a large splotch of hot BBQ sauce across the rug.  Angie was just finishing up the last two slices of meat.
She didn't even try to give me that guilty "look" when I lit into her (verbally).  By  then, our guests were showing up and, while I was mad at her, all the visitors lavished attention and love on her.   During the concert, she simply wandered from chair to chair, getting ear skritches and belly rubs from the occupants. 
By the time the concert was over, she had settled happily on the couch and was peacefully snoring.  

Angela has only very occasionally counter cruised......or maybe I just automatically put things away from the edge of the counter or table.....but she cannot be trusted around anything that smells good.  She evidently even tried the hot BBQ sauce (by the color and consistency of her "business" deposits over the next couple of days). 

When my computer was down, I would mooch time on friends' computers to check my e-mail but found myself deleting Drool postings as I did when I got back from Mexico.  Now I am catching all kinds of grief for that.  Angela noticed that she had gotten no messages from her fans and forced me to confess.  She is showing her displeasure by being even pickier about eating, by going out and then wanting back in immediately and by going over to the neighbors
(just across the foyer) to spend blocks of time.  I like to think that the latter is because it's pledge week at the public radio station to which I listen constantly, but I know she is punishing me for going off without her, for leaving her with bigger dogs and for yelling at her when she ate the BBQ as well as for falling down on my job as her publicist.  Mea culpa, mea maxima culpa.

Bill (Not telling her that I bought plane tickets for Bali in July)
Angela (Not letting on [yet] that I overheard the phone call.  Mmmm BBQ!)