[Dailydrool] Brudder E frum Prizner Nigel

[Beverly Szaton]

Oh hey Brudder I gots youse beet by a mile an a milyun. I sposed to got my
big boy brainz I now four but I tellya sumadaze dey go on vakashun.
Here da storey cupla daze ago. I too bareassed to tell befour.

See da MomPerson brung home dis liddel won, Conley. He fine when he liddel
but he aint so liddel no more. He seben months ole an gettin feelin dat
hotboy feelin. He still a baby but he startin ta push he self into
everthing. Mossly he spent lotta time gettin in trubble ( I not laffin, no I
not reely) eetin everthing. I will say he hendy for reechin stuff offa da
counners. An he reech EVERTHING. Dat what he an MomPerson fite about, not
whut he doin obberwise.
So da odder day I sittin on da MomPersons lap getting ohhhhhhh skritched and
rubbed and bellyrubs and ear rubs an juss heppy heppy heppy lubbin ever
minute. When dere so meny houndies dis kinder won on won atenshun not offen
enough. So Ise eetin it up. Dis where I belong. Da MomPerson whisprin sweet
stuff, you da man, you da sweedie dog, you my nose, is youse my big boy?
(blush) stuff like dat, dum but whut we all likes ta heer.

Den, she get up. An she let Conley in da house he been ousside prolly eeting
poop. An when she siddown he LEEP on her lap, tekkin MY PLACE. Well...HUMF
to DAT! I sez Geddoffa she! Conley dum puppy he no pay no tenshun so I sez
it louder an wif more meenin an he not payin no mind but MomPerson and
DadPerson now lookin at me like whut you say? Say whut? So's whoosh dere go
da Big Boy Brainz out da door an I Leepz up an grabs Conley (or fink I does)
wif a roar but MPerson sees me comin, grab dat liddel brat and hall he ass
oudder da way, she still sittin but she holdin he up an I grabz again an
yup, youse knows where dis goin. Got da wrong one. But I didint nose dat!
She yellin fireballs at me she lightnin outter she eyeballs but she stuck
sittin holdin dat brat away an he strugglin sayin LEMME AT IM (Oh yeah as
if)
And
WHAMMO! Frum nowhere come DadPerson maddern MPerson eben an he dunked da
hole Nigel in a towel, all wrapt roun me headbone I cant see or nuffin,
what? what? an fore I nose it I in da jail wif DadPerson ragin at me an
MomPerson ragin at me an dere ......ohhhhhnooooooooo......bloody all ober
MPerson's han, an she gots icey onit an ebberfing, diggin thro da cupperbs
for da Houndie medicine andybiyotiks. Boy she mad. She tawking cuttin dem
fambly jewels off an she meen it. DadPerson not wanna. Nigel in liddel tiny
heep in jail. Staid in dere loooooong time.

Bad newz when dey let me out da firs houndie I see dat brat. I figger I meke
sure he nose who boss. I climbs aboard. He nebber said nuffin befour but dis
time he say I no girl  gett offa me! an den I loose my brainz agin.

Spent da ress of nite in jail. MomPerson watchin me like hawkbird. She hand
sore. She not heppy wif Nigel but she say she still lubs he all da same. I
still lookin for da brainz whut must be on a trip or sumfin.
So hang in dere. Mebbe it da moon.

Love an Drool to all in need,
Nigel (No Llewis dis time, he gots nuffin ta do wif dis mess.)
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