[Dailydrool] Elwood readin da droolz

[basetsavr5 at aol.com]

Dis Brudder Elwood. Fridey nite an whut da Brudder a doin, da same fing as ebbry odder nite, git da door, answer da phone, pick up me toys, watch Brudder Jake. Me wurk nebber dun. I now gotz to read da droolz an keep up wif da nooze. Dat Momma ob mine, she wurkin realz hard, whutz up wif dis houndie supportin job, she ain't got not time ob late. Iffin she sit on da couch, da eyeballz close, but now lemme tellz ya, when she go up da stairz fur da nite dere be a noise a comin down da stairs, why it rattle me cage, keep da Brudder awake. I gib dis nudder week, iffin she ain't back to gibbin me my time, we gonna call dat bossman. Hab da man to man deescussion. Brudder Elwood a gittin da dishpan pawz.
Otay, lets read da droolz, we so far behind we lost. We so berry sorry iffin we missed da nooze, it dat Momma, she not a keepin up. She bout as old as Elder Clara.
Miss Heidi, we sendin da droolz fur Buford, we worrin, an hopin fings a gittin better.
Lenny, we a wishin youze heppy burfdey. 12 deyz of celebratin, woo hoo, dat nice.
Miss Susan whut be a lurkin, goodz to hear frum youze. We been a missin you.
Frank da Tank, moobe ober dere brudder, wif food like dat, Brudder Elwood moobin in. I smackin me lipperflapz.
Hmmmmm, Robert gittin sister dog. Brudder Elwood seyz youze be soooooorrrrryyyyyyyyyy. Git boy dog.Dem woomenz be meanz.

Well nowz we talk bout Swine flu. Dis hab wrong name. We needz to call dis da Elder Clara Flu. She big as a swine, an she kindder lookz like one ob dem swinez too. Got da snout, belly round, she do da snort, lubs to eat da dirt, yup she be swine. Oh why dooze da Brudder git stuck wif dis, why next fing youze know da Deeba be a knockin at me door, now dat be nuff to scare a houndie. And iffin dis ain't bad nuff, I bee a finkin Elder Clara gibbin Sister Daisy da lesson ob life, da Brudder keepin da eyeball on dis siteeation.
Dere no rest fur da Brudder.
We gittin ready fur da Waddle. We gonna talk wif Brudder Henry dis weekend, git da plan to meet da girlz. 
Dat all fur tonite, 

We send da droolz,




Debbie Winchester
Official Food Slave and Drool Mop Queen to
Ol' Bob, Sister Daisy, Brudder Jake
OEBE Elder Clara, Queen of Farts
OEBE Brudder Elwood, Instigator of Evil Deeds
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