[Dailydrool] pets lower blood pressure?

[Mr Shannon R Gerdel]

Good evening everyone,

I need help finding someone, please. I would like to find the person who
first stated "pets are good for your health". They then prattled off saying
such as 'they lower your blood pressure'. I would like him publicly flogged,
and denounced as someone who is absolutely, completely, and totally
constitutionally incapable of telling the truth. If my nurse came over hear
right now, I'm pretty sure she'd call me an ambulance, as my blood pressure
is anything but low.

An hour ago, I made myself a salad. I really need to lose some weight. I'm
doing something good for my health. At least I thought I was. I have not
been able to eat but less than half of my salad, as the Basset Hounds that I
begrudgingly serve will not leave me be. I almost started to cry half an
hour ago. All I wanted to do was eat a small salad. I didn't ask for time
off to eat a five course meal, ya know.

And it just keeps on getting better and better.

WARNING: Before you read the rest of this post, please be sure that you have
NOTHING in your mouth. On top of everything else, I don't want to get in
trouble for someone choking, or anything of the such. Note: I started this
email over an hour ago. It is now 8:55 pm, MST.

I am convinced, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that Arnie, Babe, or the Boo Man
put a curse on me. (For those of you that do not know, I must use a supra
pubic catheter due to my Prostatitis.)
About an hour ago, give or take 30 minutes, I felt a strange sensation on
the inside of my upper left leg. For some unknown reason, the male end of
the long hose that is attached to the drainage bag came loose from the
female end of the catheter that comes out of my stoma.

What the above all means in English is that I just went potty on part of my
recliner, and all over the living room carpet. This is great, just great.
The Boo man is in the kitchen making popcorn, and each of the Bassets has a
soda. Want to know why??? I just heard Arnie tell Boomer and Babe to hurry
up, because any moment Mommas going to comes home, and the tables will be
turned ARRRROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!

DAD'S going to get HIS nose rubbed into the carpet for going potty on the
living room carpet.

and, last but not least, I took off a pair of pants this morning to put on
my sweats. I was cold. I put my pants that were thinner on the bed.
Somedoggy, probably Mr Arnold, peed on my other pants. Oh yes you do! Stop
asking yourself "well why would Arnie do that for?" He was mad because I
wouldn't let him back out.

I quit. I'm taking a vacation. Yea, yea, yea, keep laughing.............

It's not all that funny to me, YET!!

Drool to all who need it.

Houndie Hugs and Snooter Kisses from the Caspaw Cwew!

In Drool,

Babe: dogster.com/dogs/261208
Boomer: dogster.com/dogs/235129
Arnie: dogster.com/dogs/281040
Shannon (an absolute, total, complete BassetCase)
facebook.com/shannon.r.gerdel
MySpace.com/shannongerdel

Mr. Shannon R. Gerdel
3583 Meadowlark Drive
Casper, WY
82604
bassethoundbutler at gmail.com
(307) 472-0163
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