[Dailydrool] London Adventure: Tuesday noon, messing about on the river

Tue May 2 11:48:56 PDT 2017

Younger Clara here:
Millie was not at all sure she wanted to go on the river and she wasn’t the only one. “I can’t swim,” she worried. “None of us can."
”You really don’t need to worry,” Rolph explained, “this trip is extra special and so much fun. We’re going on a Duck.”
Absolute consternation broke out at this. How on earth were 27 bassets going to fit on the back of a duck?“Just follow us,” laughed Rolph, “and all will come clear.”
We headed off to the Duck Tours base. The worried bassets soon cheered up when they saw the funny yellow trucks parked by the side of the road. “We’re not going on the river at all!” Heidi rounded on Rolph. “You were teasing us!”
“Look a hotdog stand,” sniffed Mollie Grace and she waddled over with her distinctive sailors’ walk, to snaffle a couple of dozen sausages to keep her going for the journey. The rest of the hounds soon emptied the stand of its supplies for the day, while I went to collect our tickets.
“All aboard the Rosiland” I barked. All the Ducks are named after Shakespeare’s heroines. The hounds all rushed on to the truck, full of hotdogs and expectation. Behind them, the vendor was shutting up shop for the day, looking slightly disgruntled – something about payment? He came towards me, as tour leader, but Ipo kindly stepped in and spoke to him and he briskly walked away again.
We all rushed up the steps onto the duck, and sat on the seats while our ATB friends settled on the roof.  “Are you all aboard?” barked Captain Thanet, a wire haired terrier.“First be aware this is not a truck and it is not a boat. It is both! 
"You will first take a road tour of London’s famous sights, we will drive past Barkingham Palace, the Houses of Pawliament, Westminster Abbey, Big Ben and other famous sights. Then we will splash down in the river to see the Tower of London, Traitor’s Gate, Lambeth Palace, Pawliament from the riverside and all the other attractions.
“Please keep your paws inside the vehicle and DO NOT jump out into the river. Off we go!”
"Jump in the river? mumbled Madden, were not Labradors." The bright yellow truck snorted and shook and off we went, roaring through the streets of London, with Captain Thanet's sidekick pointing out the parks and famous buildings. The truck seemed to be going very fast and we were all barking and howling with joy as we spun round Hyde Park Corner, in front of Barkingham Palace.
Not much later, the ruck turned off the road and we were heading full pelt down a slipway towards the river.“Ready for splashdown?,” roared the captain. There was a mix of yes and no from the hounds as the yellow truck hurled itself at the water with a mighty splash and immediately, started to motor right out into the middle of the Thames.
Because London grew up around the river, the sights are even better from there, but the Duck does sit quite low in the water and none of us needed reminding to keep our paws inside – until Emma saw a party boat heading in the opposite direction. The smell of the food wafting out from the cabin was almost too much. She stood up with her nose in the air. We all did. We all started to move towards the delicious scents. “Sit down! Sit down!” barked Captain Thanet, you’ll have the boat over.”
Bobo appeared at the side of the boat using his golden wings to waft all the food smells away from the hounds. He wasn’t going to see his beloved Emma fall in. The duck, which is pretty ungainly in the water, was rocking like mad and water started slopping over the edge. 
"Sit down!" bawled Captain Thanet. "Sit down before we all end up in the drink!" but the rush of hounds trying to get back to their seats made the poor duck flounder and rock until suddenly the Captain was giving orders to pit on our lifejackets and get ready to abandon ship.
Mollie Grace bounded round the boat, helping all the other hounds into their jackets and checking they all knew when to pull the inflation cord. It seems that her sailor's walk really was ideal for the job.
By now, the water was lapping around our paws and no small amount of panicked ahrooing was taking place - no need to send up a distress flair, half of London knew we were in trouble.
"Abandon Ship!" yelled the captain "And swim for the riverbank"
As we leapt off the duck, a megaphone boomed out over the water. "Ahoy there Drool pups. Horton here on the Good Ship Lollipup. Keep up the doggypaddle and Dex and Paulie will fish you out with a boathook." 
Before long, 27 wet hounds were sprawling on the foredeck, panting, gasping and begging for food. The party boat drew alongside, having helped with the rescue, and was soon passing barbecue and cake over the railings to help us recover from our ordeal.
As soon as I dried off, I remembered my manners. "Horton, have you and Dex come without Cleo?" "No maam, he grinned she has spent the whole voyage in the state room. We came by ship so she didn't have to mingle with commoners on planes and public transport - and she says she'll stay in her private state room rather than move to the hotel, and er, we're to stay here as her slaves, I mean servants."
He quickly changed the subject "By the way Miss Clara, have you met Paulie? He worked his passage with us. and we also bought  Kylee Dawn and Kaitlynn Skye as paying passengers."
Next postcard follows soon.
Clara and Rolph, loose in London with 30-odd hounds, wannabes and a pack of angles.
Where we went: https://www.londonducktours.co.uk/amphibious-london-tours/classic-sightseeing-tour/

 Please remember, if your hounds are on this adventure, do offer a little cookie money to BRNGB who save basset hounds in the UK. Visit brngb.org.uk  or search for their Justgiving page. 
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