[Dailydrool] paper maven's assistant, perhaps?

[kacy green]

Daisy the Paper Maven from Pa wrote:

"You see I like to chew paper in little pieces. I prefer envelopes,
but I like toilet paper, paper towels
(especially if they have been used for napkins and have any food on them)...I
chew the pieces real tiny so Wendy has to crawl all over the living room and
pick them up. I usually like to watch this from my perch on our couch."

Daisy,
This is Rupert, Cowboy's new adopted brother and I want to join your
paper crusade. Paper is my passion in life, I swear. I was kinda good
for about two days after these slaves took me in but then I learned
they wanted to keep me so I let my true bassetness shine through. I've
been on a mission to destroy all paper products since. Yesterday SHE
went upstairs to change, I was "happily" (*wink wink*) chewing a bone.
SHE comes back down, (5 mins top) and I has demolished a roll of
toilet paper all over the dark rug, so SHE is on her knees picking up
tiny bits of toilet paper in a "freakin suit and pumps" (her words not
mine). It was hilarious. SHE didn't think so.
Today, SHE leave me downstairs asleep, come down 15 mins later to a
roll of paper towels all over the rug. Oh and a friend borrowed
her new vacuum to try it out so again, I watched in amusment from my
newfound spot on the couch as SHE crawled around on the rug...at
least SHE dressed normal today. :)

I haven't tried those envelope things you bark of but they sound
pretty tempting, especially if you prefer them over tp and pt's. I
have however tried Blockbuster movie cases, and they are delicious.
You should definitely try them, its kind of like a puzzle. There is
paper inside the plastic cover so work your hardest to get through
plastic sleeve. Its hard work but the reward is well worth it. I just
wish I could go and watch when SHE has to do some 'splainin to the
movieman. Bwahahahaha

-Rupert