[Dailydrool] Topless in Tarzanna -- a DD Classic

[Susan Randolph]

In her wonderful tribute to Barnaby, Dawn of the West referred to a classic 
story that many of the newer Droolers may not have seen, so I thought I'd 
share this tale of Barnaby in all his youthful glory (this and many other 
favorite Daily Drool stories are available in YOU HAD ME AT AHROOO -- see 
www.fortheloveofdog.net -- with all proceeds benefiting BROOD and House of 
Puddles). Get ready, get set... ENJOY:

Topless in Tarzana

A Daily Drool Classic: I had rescued a gaunt, emaciated basset from the West 
Valley Animal Shelter and named the hound Barnaby. Barnaby recovered from 
his emaciation with a zest for life that was unnerving--and he became the 
escape artist of all time. He jumped through plate glass windows, he escaped 
through walls and levitated on top of the fridge--Barnaby's feats continue 
to outsmart me; thankfully, he is slowing down a bit, and he takes longer to 
plot his escapades these days.

On the fateful day in question, it was storming. I came home from work and 
changed into those comfy kind of clothes for rainy, 
cook-dinner-for-the-hounds kind of nights. I opened the back sliding glass 
door so Cocshall and Barnaby could go outside for a potty break--then 
Cocshall sounded the alarm. Knowing instantly that Cocshall was tattling on 
the beast, I ran out back and saw the wind had blown open our well-padlocked 
rear gates!! Devil dog was loose!!

Now, you must realize this was not the first escape he had plotted, and I 
was becoming increasingly embarrassed about his escapes. I ran into the 
house, turned off the stove, and ran out the front door into the storm 
(Cocshall loudly complaining the whole time). Rain soaked me instantly as I 
ran looking for the beast. I had been having nightmares about his escapades, 
and in a recurring one, I had watched him get hit by a car on a very busy 
street about a mile or so from my home, so I was very worried.

I spotted him!! He played that infamous "Mom gets 5 feet away then I run 
another 20 feet and sit down again" game that just makes us all crazy. Water 
soaking my clothing--the favorite de-raveling cable-knit sweater and velour 
elastic-waist sweats becoming increasingly heavier with the rainfall--I ran 
after Barnaby. Many, many city blocks. We were within one house of the very 
busy street, I was hysterical--my mind's eye seeing him running under a 
tire. This was the dream!! Noooo!!!!!

He stopped. He sniffed in a small alcove. Aha!! I had him!! Problem. I had 
forgotten a leash. Being a McGyver from way back, I began limping back home, 
bent over and holding his collar since I could not pick him up due to some 
form of abuse in his past. The water soaking into the velour sweats was 
heavier than the elastic could stand, and so I began the back-breaking trek 
home--one hand on the collar, the other holding up my pants, frantically 
searching for anything to make a leash out of. I could braid ivy; I could 
braid palm fronds; there's always telephone wire, pieces of rope, and trash 
bags laying on the streets of Los Angeles--but not tonight. Back screaming 
in pain, I did what any self-respecting proper food-slave would do. I took 
off my cable-knit sweater and looped it through his collar.

Yes, I now was topless, walking my basset down the streets of Tarzana. My 
new neighborhood, which was usually very quite, was suddenly quite busy, of 
course. I was able to hug trees and jump in bushes as cars approached--that 
is, until I got to the corner of my street. As I rounded the corner, 
thinking "Aha!! In the home stretch," a porch light came on. A front door 
was opened, and about 12 dinner party guests stepped out. I was standing 
there topless, one hand on my pants, the other on my sweater-leash in 
spotlights and no tree in sight. There was only one thing to do of 
course--and that was to wave before quickly recovering my pants from my 
knees and continuing merrily on my way home.

The next day I did a rescue run and got home in the afternoon to find a 
large flower arrangement. I have since forgotten the exact sentiment on the 
card, but it went something like: "Welcome to the neighborhood. You put on a 
good show. The Neighbors."

A final touching note, a dear Drool pal, Alisa Garbrick, that year sent me a 
Christmas gift: A velvet box with a label that read: Dawn's Dog-Walking Kit. 
Inside was a jog bra attached to a leash. I still have that kit. It's here 
at Daphneyland. One would think I would have learned how to use it!!

- originally posted by Dawn Smith (a.k.a. Dawn of the West)

Godspeed Barnaby -- you left many tears but also many smiles and wonderful 
memories.

Drool on,

Susan (slave to Toby & Daisy)
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