[Dailydrool] Classic Rerun: THE SQUID SLAYER

[Susan Randolph]

Seems like an appropriate time for a rerun of an old classic... available in 
YOU HAD ME AT AHROOO (all sales benefit rescue -- 50% to BROOD / 50% to 
House of Puddles): www.fortheloveofdog.net

Enjoy...

THE SQUID SLAYER

I'm Rozey. I get into stuff. Shure iz fun, huh? But I just can't help 
myself, 'cuz itz in my jeanz. My last advenchur waz with Momz big ol' 
dangerous giant squid. I almost pulled a muscle in my neck liftin' it off 
the chair in the bedroom! Then when I waz runnin' out of the castle with it, 
I tripped on itz tentaclez and just about killed myself when I hit the wall. 
But I got that big ol' wild thing outta the castle after a good fight and a 
couple of paw chopz to the tentaclez and hookz, and a tug-o-squid with my 
bestezt furend Miko, then I took it to the patio and rolled on it like a 
gazillion timez to finish it off, and left tell-tale gooberz on it. When the 
gooberz dried, thay looked just like a big ol' slug had crawled across that 
dead squid!

I think I saved Momz life by killin' that squid! 'Cuz one time I saw that 
squid attack her. It klung to her chest, and Mom waz jumpin' up and down and 
grabbin' it and twistin' it and contortin' and swearin' all over the 
bedroom. I think it just about suffocated her 'cuz her face waz all red, and 
she collapsed onto the bed yellin' something about a reduction. Ohhhh, that 
waz a skeery sight!! I thought I waz loosin' her for shure!! So I jumped on 
the bed and jumped on Momz chest and rolled on her to get her breathin' 
again and tried flew-to-mouth, but I was so worried I started droolin', and 
it was droppin' all over her face, but by then she waz conscious again so 
she shoved me off and yelled, "Good doG Rosey!!" And I thought, well thankz 
Mom; I am a good dog aren't I! Momz life was in my paws, so I had to do 
something to save her and never let that squid attack her again!

So anyway, the next day, after I killed the squid, Momz going like, "Tom, 
have you seen my bra? . Wherez my bra? . Rozey!!" Then Dad goez, "Rozey waz 
funny!! She dragged it down the hall and took it to the patio and tried to 
bury it in the planter boxes, then she rolled on it, then Miko went to see 
what all the growling was about, and she grabbed the bra, then Rozey grabbed 
the other end." And Dadz all laughin' and stuff. Then Mom goez, "Oy! For 
crimany sake, Tom! You stood there and watched Rozey destroy my bra?"

I don't know what this bra thing iz that Mom waz talkin' about? I think shez 
like delooshunal from losin' consciouness from the suffocation, 'cuz it waz 
a squid, and I saved her life!! But Mom found another squid in the drawer 
this morning, and it attacked her again, and all that contortin' and jumpin' 
and twistin' and swearin' started all over again.

-RozeyMae, Squid Slayer
Posted to the Daily Drool by Marilyn Bickell, Sept 2005