[Dailydrool] Emma who was waiting for her Mom to come home ...

[Hinchliffe at aol.com]

She didn't make it.
 
Oh, my friends and DD family, I am just broken-hearted and can't stop  
crying as I cradle her.  Sweet Emma tried so hard through this long,  endless 
week to hang on for her Mom to come home.  The vets tried so hard,  doing 
everything they could to keep her comfortable and peaceful.  And I  just held 
her and loved her and prayed for her and never left her alone, not for  a 
minute, this whole awful week.  Now her Mom will come home and her house  and 
her heart will be empty, and I'll have to pick her up at the airport and  
somehow find the words to tell her that we have lost forever our precious Emma,  
who I knew from the minute she was born and who spent almost every day with 
me;  dear dear Emma whom I adored; courageous, loving little Emma who tried 
with  every ounce of her special spirit to wait to see her Mom once last 
time.
 
I did everything I could this week to try to make it so that she could go  
to the bridge while in her Mom's embrace.  I know I will forever examine  
and question every move I made.  I tried to do everything for her, out of  
love.  I have been so exhausted and anguished that I fear I wasn't thinking  
straight, and I just hope that I didn't do anything wrong for her, she 
deserved  pure love and peace and happiness, our poor brave little girl.
 
We were lying in bed, she was in my arms, and I'd drifted into sleep, when  
suddenly I woke up, as I have so many times every night this week, whenever 
she  moved or her breathing changed.  This time, I knew.  For about 15  
minutes I held her tightly and talked to her as her breathing changed, kept  
telling her that her Mom was on her way to her, that her Mom loved her, that I 
 loved her, that she was the sweetest little bunny girl anyone could have, 
and I  just talked and hugged so that the last thing she heard and felt was 
pure love,  and then she was gone, in my arms, gone, gone, and I can 
scarcely breathe  through the pain and the tears and the grief and the wondering.
 
You have been my strength and my support through all of this, I really  
couldn't have made it this far without your love and your e-mails and your  
insights and your caring.  You reassured me that anything done from love is  
the right choice.  I wish you all could have known Emma, oh I can't  believe 
I'm talking about her in the past tense, I can't believe this ... 
 
I don't know how to get through this night with her right here next to me,  
but not coming back, and how to get through tomorrow and then tomorrow 
night  telling her Mom, and then all the time to come.
 
Thank you, all of you, my dearest DD friends, I love you and thank you and  
ask that you pray for Emma, on her way to the Bridge, where my Blueberry, 
who  also loved her so, waits.
 
Heartbroken,
Beth
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