[Dailydrool] Fwd: Henry

[ypppmaureen at aol.com]

-----Original Message-----
From: ypppmaureen at aol.com
To: Dailydrool at dailydrool.org
Sent: Mon, May 3, 2010 7:47 pm


Howdy to ya all,


This is Henry! Momma made an appointment for me to get "fixed" next Thursday. I still don't know what "fixed" means! I mean I've been poopin a lot more lately, could that mean "fixed"? I can't help it if she feeds me that meat enriched food that tastes so darn good. I poop at least 3 times a day cause that's how often she feeds me since I'm just a pup, so if she thinks that needs fixin, she's nuts! One of the dogs I spoke with told me it probably means my attitude needs fixin. Huh, I'll show him attitude! Who does he think he is? He's one of those fake dogs, you know, a Lasa-Poo! What the heck is that anyway! Heck, do these people sit around and think of dogs to smoosh together to form some ridiculous type of dog? And then they charge big money for these mixed dogs that at one time were referred to as a "mutt". He's just insanely jealous of me cause I'm a basset and he's not. He's the one needs fixin in my opinion! Speakin of smooshed  together dogs, momma and I were in PetSmart a couple weeks ago and a man was tellin momma about a dog he just seen at the groomers there that kind of confused him cause he never seen anything like him before. So he asked the lady there what kinda dog it was and she told him a half Mastif and a half Lasa. Boy, would I have liked bein a fly on the wall to see THAT happen! Talk about needin fixin!!!!! Woweeee!!!
I called my cousin Eddie up the other day when mamma was at work and Eddie's momma was out. He's gettin fixed this Friday and he don't know what it means neither. He's guessin it's his underbite since he's one of those Shih-tzu's. I told him that can't be what it is since Jasper, a Shih-tzu who lives two doors down from me got fixed and he still gots his underbite! Unless they screwed up somehow! Come to think of it, his underbite's lookin a bit more under lately! 
Wait a minute, I just thought of somefin! Could it have somefin to do with my paws? Momma keeps referring to them as ham hogs! And my one toe kinda sticks out a bit more on the right paw, kinda like it's tryin to escape! Naa!!! That couldn't be it! After seein momma's feet she wouldn't dare get my paws fixed before she got hers fixed!!! I can't even explain what hers looks like! Talk about ham hogs! Her feet looks like they belong to Miss Piggy!
Colt and Ruger wrote me on the drool tellin me that they got fixed! They said that when they woke up from gettin fixed they noticed the family jewels were missin! Hell, I'm makin momma crazy glue mine as close to my butt as possible! I ain't lettin nobody steal my jewels when I'm gettin so called fixed! I'm very attached to them there things and they is valuable! I'm holdin on to them to see if the economy picks up a bit, then I just might sell them on e-bay and get lots of money for them so I can buy me one of those mini-buses from the 60's with peace signs all over them! I seen one in a magazine momma was readin and I thought that would be fun to take my long naps in! It's just the right size for how long I seem to be gettin! When I walk, my front legs move, then about 17 minutes later, the back legs move. I guess it takes my brain that long to tell the back legs to move or somefin. I don't know. Momma sings that there slinky song to me all the time!
Anyway, my toes are killin me from all dis typin! I gots to go! Plus my eyes are droopin more than usual since I'm fallin asleep at the keyboard. Ya all take care now, and maybe next time I'll know what "fixed" means!


Henry 



 
 
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