[Dailydrool] OEBE qualifications & to Gwen & Sasha

[Vicki Kerns]

Hi Sasha, Quincy P. Fartwhistle here. Hey, mama was reading your post in
the Drool to me & you sound like just my kind of gal!!!  My mama wasn't
quite prepared for the "puppery" when I came to live with her in 2010. In
fact, I've heard her mutter quite a few times, "I just had to have a puppy,
didn't I?" But I KNOW she lovessssss me to pieces. I am now 16 months old
and am still a (to quote mama) "rotten-a** stinker." Well, nuts to her, I
think I smell pretty good!

Anyway, here are some of my "adventures." Mama has quote a few wooden
tables in the house and they were just so dull looking that I decided to
play "sculptor" and have nibbled my way around a coffee table and an end
table. Now mama said that was tolerable because they were pretty much
garage sale items anyway, BUT mama just about busted a vein in her head
when she came home and I had decorated her new, expensive, table where the
top lifts up and people can eat at it. I just rounded off all the corners
for her. I don't know why she got so mad cause now she won't bump her leg
on the corners! I also decided to "take a little off the sides" of a couple
of her stair steps, and decided that I don't much care for all the carpet
on the stairs so I shaved some off of them too.

I also decided that mama had just too many cords lying around. Now, they
were NOT plugged in, you see, because mama is always worried about stuff,
but she wasn't smart enough to keep the cords out of my reach. Now there
are several pretty new plugs on the vacuum cleaner, the shampooer, and
several lamps. Let's see, oh yeah, I decided I also didn't like all that
stuffing stuff that they put in the bed quilts so I've opened up a couple
of those and strategically placed stuffing around the house in places that
I thought were quite lovely.

And I made quite a delightful discovery last winter, frozen cat poop!
Wowee, I even brought some in and left it for mom thinking she might want
to try it. She didn't! Hmmm, oh yeah, mama also said I have another
problem. I am a sock-aholic. I cannot leave socks alone. I am a sock
monster! I just have to have them. I even like to pull them directly off of
mama's feet; however, she does not appreciate me trying to take her toes
with me. I also love to race around the backyard with mama's bra. I love
watching her run & scream, she's funny!

Let's see, what else, I've chewed pieces off of her desk, her bookshelf,
and have run off with a couple of shoes. Mama also cannot leave a roll of
toilet paper on the hanger because I just can't contain myself. It's like
confetti, wheeeeee! I also love to drag tree branches into the house and
when mama is trying to relax at night after waiting on me hand and foot, I
love to grab her ball of yarn while she's crocheting and run amok! Amok,
amok, amok, I think that's my new middle name. Love & snooter kisses to you
all!

Quincy P. Fartwhistle

P.S. Mama said that my older sister Cleo is the "perfect" dog and that my
foster sisters, Annie & Cleo2 are pretty much perfect too. I say phooey,
she's just prejudice cause they're girls!

-- 
Vicki Kerns


  ~≈≈~

  //^ ^\\
(/(_•_)\)
 _/''*''\_
(/_)^(_\)  ~  "Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
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