[Dailydrool] Dear Brother Elwood

[Dale Rutz]

Elwood, this is LuLu,

You are a very lucky hound.  It is a good thing you don't live in California 
because I've a to konk you one.  So you think it is unbasset like of me to like 
my toenails trimmed?  Is that what you said?  Really?  I suppose we probably 
have different history.  My toenails got so long that I couldn't walk and my 
feet looked deformed.  I had to try to hobble on my heels and every step hurt.  
My clueless momPerson got them cut every single week for a couple of months to 
get them short enough that my feet could go back to normal.  I still walk a bit 
tenderly but I can run now and nobody notices my feet.  So, to me, toe nail 
clipping spells relief.  For you, maybe it spells something else.

My clueless momPerson won't do it herself because my nails are so big and so 
thick .... so she uses the special basset lady at Pet Smart.  Been thrown out of 
there have you?  Well, so has Snoopy.  He has a nasty habit of 
ahrooooooooooo'ing at other dogs and sending them into a panic.  So he has been 
asked to leave.  More than once.  More than twice.  But momPerson is clueless 
and she keeps bringing him back.  Now he has class there every Thursday.  He 
says the trainer has a box.  If you ahroooooo then a red light comes out of the 
box and then your ears hurt until you stop ahroooooooooing.  The trainer told 
the clueless momPerson it was a new invention and she could buy one.  She's not 
buying one.  But Snoopy doesn't ahroooo in class.

Right now it is sunny and 65 degrees in our backyard and we are 3 bumps on the 
rug soaking up sun in our backyard.  


Little Gracie is the dickens.  She knows she is supposed to pee outside so she 
comes out the dog door and then she squats and pees on the patio.  What?  You 
see all that grass little girl?  What the heck?  The clueless momPerson says 
just leave her alone, as long as it is outside she can pee anywhere she wants.  
What?  If you pee on the grass it doesn't smell but if you pee on the concrete 
it stinks until it rains or somebody hoses it off.    I'd better go konk her.

More later from LuLu who is in charge .... with Snoopy who is asleep and Gracie 
who pees in odd places (but at least it's outside)
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