[Dailydrool] Dog vocabulary

[Val Brewer]

Dear Ms. Riche,
  This is Harley of Hawaii. You are so right. I personally have no need of words as I can read my slaves every move and thought. 
  When Mom puts on shoes, it means she is going outside the house, BUT it does not say where she is going. If she walks slowly, it is probably the garden for yardwork. If she walks a little more quickly, it is to the car. Keys of course confirm the latter. If it is the car, she may or may not be taking us along. If she heads to the biscuit jar, she is leaving us home. If Dad is wearing aftershave, it means a ride in the car to drop him off at work or pick him up. If she glances in my direction, it means we're invited. A garbage bag in hand coupled with a slow walk means she's just going to take the garbage out. A garbage bag in hand coupled with a quicker walk means a trip to the dump, which is next to the dogpark, which means we get to go along for the ride and a stop at the park as well. When the music on the television starts winding down, it means the movie is almost over and it is almost time for our nightly dogwalk. When the television clicks
 off, it is time to head to the door. The refrigerator door opening means potential yum. Especially when the scent of cheese wafts through the house. 
 I of course understand the usual dog words, but sometimes the very same word means a gazillion different things. A lilting "Harley?" that tilts up in tone at the end means she's looking for me, maybe for a car ride. A short staccato all one tone "HARLEY!" means "stop it right now". A drawn out, slow word in a low tone "Haaarrrrrleeeeee" means she's watching me as I creep up on my brother eating his dinner and I better not take another step forward or she'll be all over me. 
 But I also have my secrets that she hasn't figured out yet. I can tell when my slaves are planning to go out to eat at the little local dog-friendly fishmarket restaurant and my brother and I get to come along and greet the guests and share a plate of grilled chicken breasts cooked especially for us by the cook. This is my favorite. She has no idea how I can tell. Humans are so slow. Semper fido, Harley
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