[Dailydrool] My beloved Jean Paul - long

Wed Nov 6 04:14:33 PST 2013

Thank you all who contacted me after his passing.  It really means a lot, and Robert Groves, you were spot on with what you wrote.  For those I have yet to send a personal thank you, I will, sooner than later.
This sadness is very different from when Pierre Sr. passed (and very different from all the pets prior when Dad was the resident Veterinarian).  
Jean Paul had a cancer growth (anal sac cancer) removed 11/2011.  He was given a year to live with no treatment, 2 years with radiation and chemo.  I opted for no treatment.  He got his two years anyway.
JP had a second anal gland cancer growth removed in Feb of this year, and shortly after, he had a hot mess of a growth on his head that wouldn't stop bleeding and had to be removed.  It, too, was cancerous, but a different type than the other cancer.  The Vet who did the surgery was actually surprised by the biopsy outcome.
JP began to have eating issues.  That problem came and went.  JP had stool issues.  That problem came and went.  He was diagnosed with Pickwickian syndrome, and in the end, I think that was his final need for the fatal injection.
He had a horrendous cough, and that cough peaked in Sept. 2012.  We controlled for a while, but it never went away.  He was doing well on his diet, losing weight, and we thought his size was putting too much pressure on his heart.
He was doing great, but then it was time for his annual flu vaccine and lepto shot.  That was a turning point for him, and while it may just be coincidence, I will never know, but within a month of those shots, last Sat. night, I could tell suffering was setting in, and I would not have it.
As it turned out, Max was in a bad patch as he had a tough chemo, Wed. of the same week.  By Friday, and he had watery diarrhea and was not eating, my sister thought it was time for his end, but I said, let me bring him to the local vet for evaluation.  Max got fluids, Friday and Saturday and by Sunday, he was better.  Of course these were day trips for Max, port left in, and I would bring him in the morning, pick him up right before closing.  
Our Vet practice is usually closed on Sunday, but since Max was expected to arrive to either get fluids and/or get his port out (turned out to be the later), and since I had been emailing JP's Vet about his decline, when I finished with Max on Sunday morning, in a blather of tears, I said, it is time, JP is suffering.  
He couldn't eat or drink.  I brought  a small bowl to him, and he drank some, but I knew he was thirsty.  He went to his normal bowl, and was about to drink, started coughing and walked away, collapsing and heaving heavily.  His poop was now water as well.
I miss him beyond words, and I am already looking on rescue sites for the possible Jean Paul jr.  I will take that slowly, as it would not be fair to introduce a new hound to the pack while Max is still in treatment.
Of all the hounds, I feel that Pierre Jr. misses him the most.  Pierre is my side kick, we are so bonded, and when JP couldn't come upstairs anymore, I moved my life downstairs to keep him company.  I won't regret that many times during the day when he was napping, he would lift his head and look around, and I would say "All OK, JP, I am here" (he was nearly blind as well.)  Jr. stayed with us both as well.
Pierre jr. learned to give me face kisses from JP.  JP would wash my face daily, after first outs.  JP and Jr shared my bed and Jr watched JP giving me kisses all the time, and despite Jr's trainer saying don't ever put your face near Jr's mouth, he is a bonified face kisser because of JP.
JP loved to play squeaky ball.  It was his passion, and if we were in the yard, he was relentless in making us throw the ball for him.  Good times!!!  He could fit at least six in his mouth at a time.
When JP felt that he couldn't come to my bed anymore (March this year, back legs starting to weaken), he slept in his special bed outside my door in the hall.  He always came upstairs, once a day, after last outs.  Most nights, I didn't sleep much because I was listening to hear how he was doing.   Many times during the night, he slept off the bed to be on the cooler laminate floor.  Then Pumpkin would try to steal his special bed, and I would have to chase her off because, JP would go back to the bed in time.
How ironic, now that he is gone, no one is trying to sleep in his special bed.  I think it is starting to sink in with all of them.  Colette slept in his bed Sunday night, but after that, during the day, yes, but at night, no one is trying to take JP's spot.

I cannot believe how much easier it is to wrangle 7 hounds, not 8.  I suppose this has to do with my energy given to JP for healing in addition to routine care, and I am certainly not back to routine yet.  My sister was away the last three days, and I celebrated my alone time, to grieve quietly and pray for my boy.
When he was given the shot, I was with him, and I didn't even see it happen, I was so focused at looking at his beautiful face.  They have a paw print waiting for me at the hospital, and Max goes in for blood work on Friday, so I will get it then.  This time, I didn't ask for ashes, I let him go to be completely free.  I have recycled his meds back to both Vets, his local Vet and his eye specialist.  I returned his special food, and that which I couldn't return, I gave to a receptionist who feeds the same.  It was a little bit of a sad memory purge, but it was a practical thing to do.
Soon, I will start to compose his memory book.  That will bring me great joy.  When I wrote Pierre Sr's book, it was the very day after his passing, and my high emotions made that book a little sloppy.  I hope to create something very wonderful for Jean Paul, as he was so wonderful to me.
Last comment.  When JP was around 1 yr. old he did something that I can't believe he could do.  I had a cup of coffee on a coffee table, and he managed to get it to the floor without spilling a drop.  He loved to sneak a drink from anyone's cup.  Now that I think about it, and I will NEVER know, perhaps Mom put the cup on the floor for him????  
Healing drool to all in need
Jackie and the empty nest plus 7

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