[Dailydrool] Merta Lou (my heart)

[Dale Rutz]

Hi pretty girl, it's Chomper,
You know, we're a lot alike.  We look alike.  We think alike.  Myself I am cujo with strangers ...... I snarl and lunge.  My clueless momPerson will be there telling the object of my angst "oh, he is a sweetie pie, he is just cute and cuddly, you can pet him" ..... I'm snarling, I'm lunging, the object of my angst sometimes replies "really?  what's his name?" .... at this point the response of "Chomper" usually leaves them scrambling for cover.  It's amazing, almost no one ends up petting me.
It doesn't help that Snoopy howls his fool head off at strangers regardless of their species.  Him howling.  Me snarling and lunging.  It's not such a great look but it cuts down on house guests so there's that.
We had dinner guests for shabbat last week.  Daphne is 17 and so she still counts as a kid so I only snarled at her for a little bit, plus she wasn't fooled, she laughed at me and pet me while I was snarling and lunging.  Her mom Lonni was a little tiny bit scared though, so I kept it up.  I was relegated to Daphne's side of the table where I behaved for several hours but then the guests got up to leave and I decided to threaten Lonni all the way from the kitchen to the door.  I was scolded the whole way ...... I've even met her before I'm just a pain in the rear.
Like I said, Merta Lou, we're a lot alike.  Plus I'm real handsome (dalerutz.com)  wanna go steady?
Love,Chomper
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