[Dailydrool] Sketin on then nice

[Beverly Szaton]

MomPerson done loss her mine.
She say I sketin on then nice. I dont nose whut dis meen. She gots my
SPESHUAL COLLAR on me, too, whoo hoo I so speshual I gots my own speshual
collar whut nobody else ceptin oncet Llewis wears.
Granpa Mitchell he bin reel youseless lately mopin aroun an whiney. We wus
ousside an he bumpt me. He did.He bumpt me hard. I speshual. I dont like
gettin bumpt. I sez, DONT BUMP ME OLE MAN an den I fink I show him not ta
bumpt me an Blammo I gots he good! He on da boddom like rite aways (he no
like fitein, I nose dat, he eesy pickin) an he yellin an holleryin an here
come MomPerson.
Whoop.
Guess she still like dat ole dog. She kinder hab a liddel fit specially she
find da two or tree holes I meke in dat ole dog whut not stan up for
hisseff. He afraid ob me. He outta be affraid, be reeeeel affraid. I show he
who wear da...whachacallits...who gots da nebberminds in DIS fambly! He juss
a ole man. (Hey Llewis, where MomPerson now? She don't need ta see dis one.)
Whatchu meen you don't sees her no more? Where she go?You sposed ta be watch
Oooop oooop RUN RUNRUNRUNRUN

This is MomPerson. Nigel has been picking on Mitchell who will not fight
back. Mitchell now has a sore neck complete with little toothsized holes in
spots. I am livid.  Mitchell is the most harmless dog in the universe, and
certainly in this house, and Nigel is a bully. Nigel is about to learn a
tough lesson, and he and his little gonads are indeed on thin ice. (Nigel
really can be a real bully. I suspect what I am seeing is a top dog thing.
The trouble is, Mitchell could care less where he is in the pack order, as
long as we give him treats, belly rubs and tell him what a handsome man he
is. Nigel is picking on the wrong dog. He ought to be trying this with me.
Last time I looked, I was still in charge. Grrrrrrrrrrrr.
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