[Dailydrool] Dear Elder Clara re: white boxes.

[bassetslave]

Dearest Elder Clara-

Wif all due respect.....I must disagree with your acceptance of the absence 
of pwoper white boxes at your house. I'm sure that you are a fine, elegant 
senior girlie who puts up with much too much mayhem from your pack....it 
also does seem that they fail to show you an adequate amount of respect. I 
fear this is because you did not 'Drool' soon enough to have studied at the 
paw of my dearly depawted mentor, feyfey. Long before you commenced your 
most enjoyable if somewhat difficult to read, writings for Auntie Wendie, 
feyfey had her 'Dear feyfey' column on the Drool webpage. It went to the 
bridge with her....but she instructed her future royalty in the care and 
training of the humans and answered questions from her legions.

AHEM. I did not learn all of feyfey's lessons....but I did very well learn, 
"The look brings the white box." Yes, there is one of those large things in 
the room where they serve our meals.....it seems to make ice....which I 
like. It chills my water and my fwosty paws. It holds white boxes that come 
in after I am sleeping, 'till it is time to consume them. It also seems to, 
very rarely have some connection to comestibles for the humans. I do not 
allow this too often. I do not reject the uses of the large thing that is 
cold inside...but it is not a basset, "White Box."

Feyfey would be spinning in her you know what......if she had one, actually 
I believe I heard some thumping from the vicinity of her ATB box......at the 
thought that there are SIX hounds in your house and that collectively you 
have not trained the humans to provide a consistent source of white box. She 
firmly believed, and trained that if there were more hounds than the average 
left over container, it might just be necesary to order an extra meal so all 
get a hefty taste. She carefully trained our slaves to go to parties and 
banquets and, if need be, eyeball uneaten fare on the plates of strangers. A 
loud, "May I have a box for my basset hound?" oft produces offers of 
additions from other plates and, on a good day, an offer from the waitstaff 
to multiply the goodies many fold. A routine that need be performed even 
when the pawsonal hounds are not present.....THERE MUST BE A BASSET AROUND 
SOMEWHERE! Feyfey was particularly proud of the night that the slaves went 
to Lawry's Prime Rib in Las Vegas......... it was the grandslaves' 50th 
anniversary. She slave saved a good portion of her meal to bring to Auntie 
Darlene's houndage. (Peanut was young then and just so cute.) As the 
waitress boxed it, the she slave remarked that it was a pity that there was 
so little as Auntie Darlene then had a pack of about 15. POOF. Suddenly a 
huge box was filled with leftovers from about half the restaurant. The 
slaves then had to drive about 45 minutes each way to leave the box for 
Peanut and pack. Fancy trolling for hounds they had just met that required 
them to drive to the far edge of a neighboring hound, passing the coyote on 
the street (literally, he was moving too fast for them to offer to share 
any). Now that is slave training.

There are SIX of you? You are the senior and can't get the group to fire up 
the LOOK and use it till proper white boxes are presented?  Before I moved 
here, I lived with my breeder pack and had up to about 20 relatives 
there.........there were still times I would hear feyfey's voice. With some 
effort we could get the breeder slaves to cruise luncheons and restaurant 
kitchens for enough for all. My dear son, Jackie has moved out but has his 
new slave trained to visit the pack........and bring a cheeseburger for each 
hound in residence. Heck, Auntie Taco Woof recently got them to bring home 
the leftover food from a family memorial service.

Clara, baby! You are letting them slack off. My slaves read what you wrote 
and started thinking that was acceptable. They are not all that 
bright.....if it is in writing from a fine elder houndette, they start to 
believe....I say, NO! White boxes are our due, from restaurants. It is the 
gospel according to feyfey.

Whew! I felt her spirit. Maybe she does transcend time and space.......and 
maybe there is hope for me. I thinks she would let me sign this as she would 
have......just when I am saying WWFFD.

Woofles,

Cakie, Pw....but never as good as feyfey
Auntie Taco! Are you pwoud? Please, I need you.