[Dailydrool] To Willow, From Rupert

[kacy green]

 Hey there Willow. I read you inquiry about OEBE and tips to help your
chances of getting inducted. It sounds like you are off to a good start
eatin that big yeller book. I am a sucker for paper-products so you
definitely sound like my kinda girl. Paper is really fun and easy to rip
apart. You can do so much damage in such a short amount of time, its
incredible. Start keepin your eyes open fur paper pinching oppurtunities.
Look for newspapers left on the counter, envelopes delivered by the mailman
or the brown truck, toilet paper hanging down just close enough for you to
grab. Books are good too (as you have already found out) and I especially
love love love paper towels. All you have to do is some simple quick chewing
and shredding to make the entire roll useless. If you get tired of paper,
start looking for shoes, high heels are especially delicious. Socks are fun
too and underwear (preferably dirty) are the ultimate treat. Indulge
yourself as much as possible and keep us all updated on your doings. When
you think you've gotten away with lots of stuff then contact Roland
(slave:Janice Colvin) and give him a list of all your rotten doings. He will
then either approve to induct you into the club or he'll give you some
pointers to keep you on the right track.

The key is to keep your rotten deeds random. If them slaves start crating
you or putting things away too often, be good fur a couple days. Trust me it
will pay off big time. Random random random, that is the road to rotten
happiness.

Best of luck and do remember to keep us updated.
In loyal rotteness,
Rupert, Ragmatical Regisseur of Random Acts of Rebellion
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