[Dailydrool] A Basset Adventure...from a slave's perspective

[njmedic702 at aol.com]

I laughed out loud at the "topless" story.  Desperate times call for 
desperate measures.  Oh, how I wished I was wearing a sweater last 
night.  You see, what happened was, DH lost his brain for a moment.  
However, a moment was all it took...sigh.

As you know, we are selling the house and when we have showings, we 
lure the houndage into the double garage with treats.  There's dog beds 
in there and it's a safe spot for them to be whilst someone is 
traipsing through "their" house.  They can smell but cannot leap 
exuberantly upon them or sneak out the door.  Like most garages, we 
have a remote control which opens the door.  In our case, this remote 
is located on the driver's visor.  Dadslave KNEW the hounds were in 
there; half the time he doesn't even go for the remote until we are 
right next to the door.  But NO, last evening he pushed the button as 
we were pulling in the driveway.

"What are you doing?" I shrieked. "CLOSE THE DOOR!!!!"  He did but not 
before four heads, followed quickly by their bodies came happily 
underneath, effectively activating the electric safely eye and raising 
the door yet again.  I threw open the passenger side door and 
immediately began singing loudly "Who want a ride in the car?"

Dudley, immediately jumped in.  Dozer, turned around considered this, 
then stopped where he was.  I shut Dudley in and grabbed Dozer's collar 
and hauled him over to the car, lifted his front paws onto the floor in 
the back seat and then, hoisted his heavy hiney up as well.  YES!  Two 
out of four....right?

But, no, Dadslave had opened the driver's door, hoping to entice either 
Daisy or Delilah who were busily sniffing the grass in the front yard 
to enter therein.  So, out goes Dud.

I call to Daisy who comes, lets me get close enough for my fingertips 
to graze the fur on her back, but then takes off across the neighbors 
side yard, Dud in close pursuit.

It's amazing what passes through one's mind in these 
circumstances...like why haven't I reinforced the STAY command more 
vigorously, and "What was it that one Drooler said worked for her?  Oh, 
yes - sit down on the ground and call to them...they think you want to 
play with them and will come."  So, I sat my butt down on the dew 
saturated grass and cooed "Daisy, Duddy....come here to Mama - let's 
play."  Dud came immediately, bupster that he still is.  Daisy, on the 
other hand, played a bit harder to get.  Finally, she, too. came close 
enough for me to grab hold of her Nightengale collar.  Oh, was I saying 
prayers of gratitude to it's manufacturers...

So, I bellow for the Dadslave - CRAIG!!!! No response.  Again.  Still 
no response.  Okaaaaaay....that leaves me but one choice; walk bent 
over at the waist, one hand on each collar of two, still very excited 
to be out of their yard, Basset hounds.  First hurdle...how do I get 
up?  Got it, I'll switch both collars to one hand and use the other to 
brace myself.  Riiiiiight.  I try this and after two failed attempts 
and nearly crushing Dudley in the process, I am up and moving, albeit 
slowly.

Deep breath..."Okay, guys...let's go see Daddy."  With this off they 
lurch and the next thing I know I am picking myself up off the street, 
trying to ignore the scrapes on both knees.

"Easy, guys.  Go easy!"

We are making slow but steady progress across the neighbors lawn when 
suddenly one of them stops dead to sniff something and I find myself 
facedown on the grass, nursing a "grassburn" below my right eye, right 
on the bone of my eyesocket.  Why, you ask, would this happen if one 
was wearing glasses?  WAS being the key word - as they were somewhere 
underneath my upper body where they fell when they flew off my face.  I 
picked them up and briefly surveyed the damage; they are bent, but not 
broken...sorta like me.

I think it is beyond time to bellow yet again for the Dadslave.  My 
back is killing me, not to mention my knees and my face.  This time I 
hear a shouted reply, "I'm coming."

"I really need you and some leashes."

I see the lights of the car as he pulls out of the driveway and next to 
the curb where the dogs and I are and tosses me the double leash.  
Obviously, the man has a death wish; am I to hook them on with my 
toes???  I glare and say "I could use a bit of help here."  He gets the 
not-so-subtle message and comes and attaches the leash to Daisy.  One 
hand freed, I clip the remaining lead to Dudley.  Tails are 
wagging...they obviously think a walk is in their future.  NOT! I limp 
the rest of the way across the grass and into the garage.

"Don't open the inside garage door, the other two are in there.  Thank 
dawg he said that or the chase would be on, yet again, for at least two 
of them.  He pulls the car into the garage, the door comes down, and 
Basset air-lock secure, I open the basement door, unclip the leashes 
and the thundering herd heads up the stairs, woofing for dinner.

Today, the slightly black eye doesn't look too bad if I apply the 
concealer just right.  About the knee I just had scoped...well, it 
seems the other one took most of the impact of the fall...I think.

Score  Bassets 4
          Slaves   0

Sandi, Mamaslave to The Belles and The Boys - Daisy, Delilah, Dozer and 
Dudley  <--------who thinks the Board Waddle would have been safer