[Dailydrool] Moon Doggie Marley at the Bridge

[Moon Doggie Donna via Dailydrool]

I posted this on Facebook Monday afternoon.  My Marley has joined his
brother Fred at the Bridge...

Up to 5:15am this morning, Marley seemed fine. I knew he had cancer, but he
was eating & drinking fine. Clean bowl fine. I had to give him 12-14 pills
a day and he loved his pill pockets. I could just pop them in his mouth and
he would wait for the next one. I have a feeling he knew there were nasty
pills hidden in them, but he rarely let on.

We started the oral chemo about a week and a half ago and except for being
a little lethargic, he was fine. I wanted to make sure I was feeding him
the correct diet - one that would put some weight on him because I knew his
appetite would probably not be the same in another couple of weeks. I
researched and researched for hours all day Thursday & Friday. Saturday I
went food shopping and bought ground beef, beef liver, chicken liver and 10
more pounds of boneless, skinless chicken breasts. Also bought some
sardines, tuna in olive oil, steel cut oatmeal, cottage cheese and
supplements - fish oil capsules, oyster shell calcium and MSM as well as
apples, sweet potatoes, broccoli, blueberries and bananas. Yes, all for
him. Last night, I cooked some chicken and simmered that nasty beef liver,
He was going to have a great breakfast! It was not to be.

This morning at 5:15am, I woke up to Marley vomiting bile next to the couch
where I was sleeping. After cleaning up and disinfecting the area (have to
do that right away due to the chemotherapy drugs), I noticed he was panting
and breathing heavier than normal. He also was having a hard time getting
up in the rear. Finally, he got up and went outside. He was having problems
peeing and pooping. Then he had trouble coming up the ramp. When he finally
got inside, he laid down and would not move.

His oncologist was not in today, but I emailed her to see if it was the
chemo making him act the way he was. She told me not to give him any today
and to bring him into the emergency section to get checked out. He was
groaning and I did not want him to do the hour (without traffic) trip to
Stamford, CT. So, I was able to bring him in to Morph's vet (Dr. Mulry) who
is only 5 minutes away. It was a nightmare pushing him to get up and walk
to the car. He was in horrible pain and was snarling as I tried to lift his
rear so he could stand. I don't want to relive those moments, so I digress.

As soon as Dr. Mulry saw him, she knew it was not good. Stamford had faxed
her all his records, so she knew what was going on. This was not the oral
squamous cell carcinoma - it was something worse. There was a possibility
of a tiny tumor on his liver. We knew that a few weeks ago and that was one
of the things that made us decide against removing his lower jaw. After an
xray, it looked like there was now a mass on his spleen close to his liver.
A fluid tap of his belly confirmed some blood, although not much. The only
way to know for sure would have been an ultrasound which would have had to
be done at another facility. Marley was miserable and in a lot of pain.
There was no way I was going to drag him in for more tests. What if it DID
confirm another tumor? Would not have done surgery, so why put him through
all that?
As my heart was being torn out of my chest, I held my boy for the last
time. And for the first time, I was able to kiss him on his snooter - not
afraid that my grumpy boy would bite the nose off my face. Although as I
put my head close to his, I did think for a split second that his eyes
would open and he would let out that little warning telling me to back off.
How I wish I could hear his howl or growl just one more time.

Donna Funk
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