[Dailydrool] completely unsatisfactory

[Dale Rutz]

Hello from Chomper,
I am writing to report a completely unsatisfactory string of events which have occurred here in my home.
Firstly my momPerson and my dadPerson got out some of those bags with hinges.  You know the ones??  Snoopy said this is a very, very bad sign.  Especially because they both have them, sometimes one of them has them, and other times the other one of them has them, but they both had them.  That has never happened before (that I know of).  But Snoopy said is HAS happened before.  And it is really, really bad.
Well, the next thing you know they stuffed a bunch of stuff in those bags and then they stuffed those bags in the trunk of the car.  And then they got in the car and LEFT US!!  OMG it was HORRIBLE it was terrifying I was lonely ..... well the (no longer a) teenager was here, she lives here, but she works FULL TIME.  The day she left she was working 3 to closing so she fed us dinner at 2:30 in the afternoon and then she didn't come home till 9:30 at night and it was dark and we were along for 7 hours and it was terrifying.
AND, when she came home she brought her friend and she isn't allowed to have her friends over when our parents aren't home so I chased her friend up and down the hall nipping at her heals and wouldn't quit lunging and barking and biting and then ..... and then ..... it was bed time.
Well this is the worst because Snoopy has to sleep in the bed, being cuddled and he has to sleep in the BIG bed and he can't get up there alone.  And Snoopy weighs 70 lbs and only mommy or Natalie can lift him and Natalie is AWAY at college so....... if you can believe it .....
The friend and the (not anymore a) teenager did a double lift to get Snoopy into the bed and then GOT INTO the bed with him in the middle so he couldn't fall out and slept with him but I ...... well I sleep in there too but I ........ I ..... I had to SLEEP with the FRIEND in there.  And now that I've slept with her I can't bite at her anymore, you can't sleep with them and then bite them, it's not OK so now the friend is family I guess??  I dunno.
They got up in the morning and drove all the way to UC Santa Cruz and kidnapped Natalie and told her she had to come home and stay home until our parents came home because they couldn't manage two basset hounds.  I'm SERIOUS.
And that was the FIRST DAY.  Our Parents were gone FIVE days.  LOTS more happened.  All of it totally unacceptable.  I will report more later.
Goodbye from Chomper.
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